Who WIll Take Home The Title Of “Riding Lawn Mower Champ”?

riding lawn mower comparison

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The ancients believed that the sun and moon had a daily tug-of-war over the light and darkness.

There are stories of civilizations over 2000 years old that used the tug-of-war to settle disputes, rally troops before battle, and even as part of cultural rituals.

The Chinese.  Greeks.  Indians.  Scandinavians.  John Deere.  Allis Chalmers.

You will not believe what happens in their backyard….Twice!!

Wait.  What?

That’s right.  Perhaps the most epic tug-of-war you will ever see took place between angry, tire-spinnin’, beer-guzzlin’, party-lovin’ lawn tractors.

In this corner… of the driveway, wearing red trunks and 44 waist Carhartt jeans, Allis Chalmers!

And in this corner… of the patio, wearing green trunks with yellow trim and a home-made muscle shirt, John Deere!

Imagine the scene:  You’re at a 4th of July picnic.  A warm breeze blows through the back yard.  Your beer cushy is soaked with can sweat.  Your belly is full of barbeque, corn on the cob and baked beans.  There’s only one thing that could finish off this perfect day…

One of those strawberry, blueberry and whipped cream cakes that looks like an American Flag?

No, you idiot.  A lawn tractor tug-of-war.

The John Deere is the current champion of this lawn and garden.  But those of us who have been around for a while remember when the old, dependable Allis Chalmers ruled the north 40 and back behind the tomato garden.

Some of the all-time greats had to learn the hard way that they should have stayed in retirement.  Michael Jordan.  Brett Favre.  And apparently this Allis Chalmers lawn tractor.

You think the driver would have learned the first time… Nope, it had to happen twice for him to learn his lesson.  I hope.

I think one of the onlookers said it best, “OK, I think we should be done now.”

You have to see it to believe it.

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